Posted on by shirindawna · 1 Comment

i’d do anything for love.

i’m a giver.

in a relationship (and i don’t just mean romantic), i will give and give and give…

it’s just what i do.

my ex-bf said it makes me who i am and it’s what makes me comfortable in my skin. i don’t know about the last part, but the way i see it. if i can help someone i care about, why wouldn’t i?

the problem i’ve seen with givers (and i may be projecting a little here…) is knowing your limits. i’m typically great with boundaries and limits…EXCEPT when i’m in love or when dealing with a close friend/family member.

unfortunately, i’ve encountered people who just take. all the time. it’s like they only have a ‘receive’ button – and no ‘send’. these people are exhausting. mentally and emotionally. they’ll drain your energy and your patience. for any relationship to work, there needs to be a back and forth. otherwise, resentment starts to creep in. also, if you’re the only one giving, you’re never allowing the other person to give to the relationship and you aren’t giving yourself a chance to experience the other side.

bottom line: if you’re giving, make sure the other person is too. don’t fall into the trap of dealing with people that deplete your energy, patience, and desire to help others!

now. go forth into the world and make it better!

Posted on by shirindawna · 1 Comment

things you should never say to a girl. ever.

1. you look tired. (even if we do. we don’t need you to tell us. thanks!)

2. my ex would… (don’t EVEN think it. we’re already psycho about your ex-girlfriends, even if we never admit it. we don’t want to think you’re comparing us to the last girl you dipped your stick into. unless you want to hear about the last dreamboat we shared a pillow with)

3. you deserve better. OR i’m not good enough for you. (umm…are you looking for validation? because i’m not going to give it to you. all you’re going to do is convince me you lack confidence, which = unattractive. and perhaps even get me to agree. is that what you want?)

4. your mom is a bitch. (just because i’m allowed to say it doesn’t mean you are. even if she does ignore you and pretends like you don’t exist when we go over there for dinner)

5. you’re wearing that? (uhh – no, i was just showing you the contents of my closet that i never intend to wear. p.s. thanks for making me self-conscience about my outfit for the rest of the day. i had a boyfriend that would always comment on the things i wore to work. one day he looked at me and said ‘you look like a fairy princess’ while i’m a big big fan of being compared to a princess in a fairy tale, he didn’t mean it in a nice way. my puffy sleeved shirt has never been worn since.)

6. if you loved me, you’d… (seriously? don’t try to manipulate us. we’re better at it than you are.)

7. i don’t believe in monogamy (ok ok, this is one i’ve never heard from a guy. but i’ve said it. and it didn’t go over well. so, don’t make the same mistake i did.)

Posted on by shirindawna

i’m the luckiest girl in the world!

my dad has cancer.

my best friend moved away.
i might be laid off.my latest bout with birth control left me moody, frequently nauseous, broken out, and all around CRAZY.

oh. and i never got the barbie dream house i always wanted.

yet…last night for the first time in a very long time, i took the time to count my blessings. it is an activity i used to practice every night before bed. and every single time, it helps me feel better and put things into perspective. i’m so fortunate in so many ways. and i’m grateful. for everything.
aside from lifting my spirits, it’s actually a fun little game to play (sure beats counting sheep!) alone or take turns with a pal (if you’re sharing the bed with one. i may or may not have been). try it tonight!
Posted on by shirindawna · 1 Comment

forever. for now.

life is seasons.

people change.

feelings shift.


i don’t understand how people can promise forever. honestly, i just don’t get it. i mean, i can’t even be sure of what i’ll want to do tomorrow…let alone next year or twenty years from now. sure, i’ll always love my family and my friends, but i don’t live with them. in a relationship, is there really such a thing as forever?!

of course i want there to be. it’s such a lovely thought. you meet someone, you fall in love, and you stay together. forever.

‘forever – is composed of nows’ emily dickinson

…forever. for now.

Posted on by shirindawna · 1 Comment

on love…

sometimes (often), i mistype things. i was at work one day chatting with my favorite IM buddy and i intended to say something about being in love when i accidentally typed ‘on love.’ and you know what? it actually makes more sense.

you’re not so much ‘in’ love as you are ‘on’ it, like a drug. that’s why coming off it (break ups) are SO hard. love detox. nothing worse.

i won’t get into the whole euphoria, exhilaration aspect of it. because it’s cliched. and i hate cliches. and i know that hating cliches is SO cliched.

anyway, my point is. i’m on love. and it’s delightful. and scary. and seriously makes all your shit come out (read: i’ve got some major issues).