there are few things worse than watching your friend settle for someone who isn’t good enough for them. i just can’t wrap my head around the concept of settling. i mean, sure…nobody is perfect and all that, but they can be perfect for you .
it’s no secret. finding “the one” is no easy feat. if you’ve found that person (or think you have ~ for now, good for you, i’m happy for you. thrilled. ecstatic. and possibly a little envious. if you haven’t, then i can relate.

the media pervades our minds with ideas of forever…and not a realistic version of it. we’re supposed to find ‘the one’ and live happily ever after. don’t get me wrong. i’m secretly a hopeless romantic and i loooooove the all the cheesy movies that are responsible for my lack of clarity when i fall for a boy. but all that said, one does need to keep a level head and realize (sadly) that these situation just don’t tend to happen in real life.

happy endings don’t just materialize after your lost glass slipper created by your fairy godmother is placed on your foot. you have to fight (fairly) for them. and want them. and believe in them. it’s not easy, it takes work. and most people aren’t willing to do what it takes (hence our divorce rate). or maybe we just don’t know HOW to do it? maybe our parents didn’t set the best example? maybe our family is filled with cheaters and liars and we’re unable to figure out how to make a good, healthy relationship work. true love isn’t forever unless you’re really interested in making it work. and based on our fat, lazy society…how many people look like they’re interested in anything that takes any work?

sorry if that’s a little hard to swallow, but i sincerely believe this. for example, i LOVE food. LOVE it. i love sweets, i love peanut butter, i love chips, i LOVE lemon month at souplantation, i love it all. but guess what? i also love fitting into my pants…so, i’ve come to accept that it takes work. it takes exercise, moderation, and constant work. it’s a sad, true fact.

i’m no stranger to love. i’ve loved several times…and several times thought it was my ‘forever love,’ but every time – it didn’t last. the reasons were different each time…but it all essentially boiled down to the same thing: we changed. and grew apart.

my 20 year-old self wanted something very different than my (almost) 30 year-old self does. and my 25 year-old self wanted something completely different than my 27 year-old self…what i’m getting at is: people change…it’s inevitable, but the key seems to be finding someone you can grow with. clearly it happens. otherwise we wouldn’t see couples celebrating 50 year anniversaries. i’m always curious about these couples. are they still in love? were they ever? when the butterflies and sparks fade, what remains?

this has basically just turned into a stream of consciousness at this point…thoughts and ideas on love, relationships…i realize i’m all over the place, but that’s how i am on the subject in general. at least, for now. so, look for love. and be romantic, but remember to use wise mind and in the end, if the love you’ve found doesn’t work then cherish the good memories and look forward to great times ahead.

our experiences will all be different, but in the end, that’s all you have: your own story. and your own experiences by which to define love.

and who knows? maybe you’ll be one of the lucky ones celebrating your 50 year anniversary…