Posted on by shirindawna · 2 Comments

you’ve gotta update your fairytale, baby.

‘you live in a fantasy world’ my mom said to me about 4 years ago when i described my ideal relationship/partner to her.

‘you won’t find that. sometimes you need to train them’ my cousin advised after telling her what i wanted in a mate.

i bring a lot to the table. and i expect the same. so, while i love & respect both these women, as the eternal optimist, i refused to settle. and THANK GOODNESS.

i don’t remember the first place i was when i began to dream of the boy that would someday tell me he loved me…but i knew immediately when i first felt ‘it’.

‘falling in love consists merely of uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.’

the complete surrender of your heart & feelings to someone else is unnerving, but more gratifying than anything i’ve ever felt. magical.

i can’t explain the serenity that comes from knowing your heart is in the best possible hands & exactly where it’s meant to be. so, i’ll say what it seems i’ve been saying repeatedly: i’m happy.

and living my fairytale.

Posted on by shirindawna

trust creates peace.

…says my yogi tea this morning.

and i agree.

at the risk of sounding like a broken record, i haven’t ever felt this ‘at peace’ – and not in the creepy/dead way. just happy. so so SO happy.

glad i never ever settled.

thankful i trusted the universe.

and i swoon over the message that my boyfriend sent to my bestie: The way I love my girlfriend should replace all definitions in every dictionary, descriptions in every novel & examples in religious writing.

*swoon, swoon, SWOON*

..and while i know there is no such thing as ‘perfect’ – to me, he is. perfect for me, anyway.

we will return to our regularly programmed snark & sass soon. stay tuned….

Posted on by shirindawna

it’s like a dream.

i’ve always had very vivid dreams…which was interesting when i was a (bratty, obnoxious) child because they would often result in fear-paralyzing nightmares that left me screaming and subsequently, cuddled up in my parent’s bed.

or wide awake in the early morning wondering how i went from being a fairy princess back to my regular life…as a princess in my own imagination.

i digress (and it isn’t pretty)…

several months ago, i had a dream about a good friend. i dreamt her boyfriend proposed to her. oddly enough, the next night he did. i hadn’t spent any time with him prior to that so the dream was as random as they come…

it’s been a common theme in my life: dreams.

approximately 6 months ago i had a dream about a guy. i don’t know who he was, but i know how i felt with him next to me. i woke up and wrote down my dream in detail (which i would typically share…but i’m holding back on this, some things are sacred). i don’t know who the guy was since he had no face, but i knew i loved him. and i knew that i wanted to stay in that moment with him forever.

i recently met someone (that feels weird/exciting to share). and soon after i had that same dream again. this time the guy had a face: his.

…which is unnerving to say the least. but simultaneously, oddly comforting.

if my past dreams are any indication, then great things are in store.

and are already happening.

i can honestly say i’m happier than i’ve ever been. beyond happy. so happy i need a new word for ‘happy.’

and excited that i’m fortunate enough to be living my dream.

to boot.

Posted on by shirindawna

contemplating.

i love the rain.

i love feeling inspired.

and i love any excuse to throw on boots.

here’s something very melancholy about the rain…and yet i find it soothing.

i’ve had gordon lightfoot on repeat. he’s a cynic. i like that coupled with the rain.

rain is good for inspiration. or maybe it’s sadness? the rain made me nostalgic…and yet much to my surprise, i didn’t get stuck in that emotion. i guess i shouldn’t be surprised. i’m not meant to be sad. but something about gloomy weather has always made me gloomy on the inside. today is an exception. and why shouldn’t it be? after all, i have pink rain boots. and i love having an excuse to wear them.

i wish i could stay in bed and write all day. i believe that’s what rainy days were meant for…reading and writing.

i’m contemplative today. and i like it.