happy birthday to my bestest audie,
at your bachelorette this weekend you sure were naughty.
it’s your day so don’t be blue,
in a couple months, i’ll be 30 too.
the more candles, the bigger the wish,
wasn’t that gustavo just a dish?!
i hope the most you wish for, is the least you get.
in your shoes, i’d be wishing for a pink barbie corvette.
why barbie? why pink?
seriously audie – less questions! i’m not a shrink.
i tease you cuz i love you, no other reason,
those hollywood men were quite good at the teasin.
my poem ends here because it sucks,
honestly though, i don’t give a…
a moral dilemma.
i have a shopping problem. there i said it. i admit it. i own it (or want to – if i can wear it!). it’s no secret that the shopaholic books are my absolute favorite (before they ruined them by making that atrocious movie!). sadly, i find them completely relatable, hilarious, and oh-so-very-true! (sophie kinsella ~ call me! let’s be bff.) anyway, i digress…
now i have an even bigger problem (no, it isn’t my lack of employment. or funds). one of my favorite (and ridiculously overpriced) stores recently made an error (in my favor ~ i know, i thought that was a myth that only happened in ‘chance’ cards in monopoly) and i now own a pair of $100 pants that i didn’t pay for. i can’t bring myself to wear the pants…and i haven’t yet taken them back (i know i should…right?!) so, what do i do?
i mean, i spend lots and lots of money at this store and they do have an outrageous mark up on their items…
but, i can’t reconcile that justification with the fact that i know the right thing to do would be to take them back…
oooor do i just pay it forward and give the pants to a friend??
help,
a confused shopaholic.
please boys, learn to spell.
there is nothing (well, virtually nothing) that turns me off faster than bad grammar or spelling. i completely fail to understand how this epidemic came to be. boys can’t spell (neither can girls for that matter). and it’s sad.
if you’re smart, witty, funny, can spell, and can quote a few books then chances are: i’ll dig you. looks aren’t really that important (to me, anyway). unless we’re talking about my current bf, who is arguably the cutest thing i’ve ever seen. and i think he gets cuter daily. while i just get closer to needing botox. it’s not fair.
i digress. there is no excuse for not knowing basic spelling and the differences between words like: there, they’re, their or your and you’re. while i’m a big, huge advocate of working on your fitness – i don’t think you should neglect your brain.
while we’re on it:
be honest.
be real.
be loyal.
be faithful.
be funny.
even if you are not a wordsmith, as long as there is earnest love in every syllable, we will never cease to be impressed. or to fall. it’s no secret that the way to my heart is with words (genuine ones). and yes, i’ve fallen in love via text. and email. more than once.
i’ve heard ‘if you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.’ and while i tend to agree. it’s a little different with me. (what isn’t?) if you can paint me pictures. with words. i’m yours.
so boys. please, please, please, please, please learn to spell. for all the intelligent single gals out there who deserve a smart fella.
thank you.
more than meets the eye.
so, i am a bit (read: big, huge, giant) of a hypocrite.
i will admit. i used to cheat. on everyone.
granted…it was always on my way out of a relationship, but still. it doesn’t make it right and i don’t make excuses for my own bad behavior. it was wrong. i was wrong. and i should’ve ended one relationship before starting another. sadly, i was young and dumb and guilty of the occasional overlap.
once a cheater always a cheater? i don’t think so. at least i hope not. the recent media coverage of philandering husbands has really helped put things in perspective. i mean, what’s the point? why get married if you’re not ready to be with just one person?
what has changed me? empathy. (translation: it happened to me. and it HURT). from there i morphed into the jealous girlfriend…to the ‘do whatever you want’ girlfriend…to the ‘do what i tell you’ girlfriend..to whoever i am now (read: i’d like to explain but it’s constantly changing/evolving). the way i see it: i’d never do anything i wasn’t comfortable with my partner doing. and if he doesn’t feel the same way and is willing to jeopardize ‘all of this’ (no time for modesty, i’m the total package) then he doesn’t deserve me.
so there it is. a confession and a lesson. happy transforming!
sdinsd 