Posted on by shirindawna · 1 Comment

it’s raining, it’s pouring.

i can’t sleep.

as i lie in bed & listen to the sky dump water, i can’t help but think of the boy that used to sleep next to me. he loved to fall asleep to the sound of the rain. how ironical that it’s now the reason i’m unable to sleep…

as i type that i realize it isn’t entirely true. i had trouble falling asleep earlier. and the sky hadn’t started crying yet.

i was thinking about a boy then too…as i often do. not one from my past this time, i don’t make a habit of visiting there. one from my present. and hopefully my future. i feel anxious typing that. like i’m jinxing something.

i shared that sentiment with my bestie today. i told her i’m happy for what i have today & am not brave enough to wish for more.

her reply was ‘you don’t have to be brave to wish for something.’

so, i’m wishing…that he’ll be the next one i listen to the rain with. and if i’m very lucky, the last.

it feels brave to admit. even if it isn’t.

Posted on by shirindawna

the sound of music.

while on vacation with my best friend and her husband this week, she insisted that i talk to the guy that was singing along with the live band we were watching.

bestie: shirin! come talk to this guy, he’s got pipes.
me: (to her husband) yeah, but he doesn’t have looks.
bestie: he’s such a great singer!
me: (to her husband) will you tell your wife i’m trying to start a family, not a band.

i don’t know how i got to be this funny.

Posted on by shirindawna · 2 Comments

urban allure.

it takes a lot to win me over. and i’ve been crushing. hard!

i’m easy to be with, but hard to get. i can fall in love with a boy or i can fall in love with a song, but it isn’t a person or tune i’m thinking of tonight: it’s a place.

anyone who knows me knows my heart belongs to san diego, but recently i’m finding other cities very alluring…

my two recent trips to the city by the bay have reaffirmed my love for san francisco. the city that almost had me for college. initially, i thought it was just infatuation. i’m often rash & impulsive, but this has been a long time coming. i think it may be time to explore my feelings. i’ve bounced around the idea of a power move for long enough. it’s time to take that leap. and say yes to life.

the east coast feel of this west coast city has captured my heart & for the first time in a long time, i had trouble saying goodbye.

i’m headed home, but it feels like i left my heart in san francisco. as the wheels of the plane touch the ground, i’m typically overcome with a sense of calm. san diego has always felt right. this time it feels different. it feels like i’m meant to be someplace else.

sdinsf doesn’t have the same ring to it, but i have to follow my heart. and i trust that the universe will take care of the rest.