another sleepless night.
i’m so restless these days. it isn’t a new feeling.
and it isn’t a bad one…i feel like i’m on the brink of so much that i’d rather not waste time sleeping.
i want immediate gratification.
life has other plans.
howl.
when i was a kid, i had an irrational fear of wolves. i was convinced they were going to come to my house & ravish me. clearly, ‘little red riding hood’ and ‘the 3 little pigs’ traumatized me.
my fear of wolves has since faded, but when i heard about this old native american legend, i was once again intrigued.
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.
“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
just goes to show…not all of them are big, bad wolves. and there’s nothing to fear.
new year. old me.
it’s a new year. and the old me is back. she’s a little wiser, much sassier, and happier than ever.
this year i resolve to be the best version of me that i can be. not sure who that is yet, but i’m excited to figure it out.
and to take advantage of opportunities. because lately i’ve been presented with so many.
2011 is already an exciting year. 2010 closed a lot of wrong doors and i’m thrilled to see the right ones opening.
and since i either do things with my entire heart or not at all, i’m ‘moving forward using all my breath’…because ‘the future’s open wiiiiiiide!’
(ironical that this song popped up as i was finishing this post? i think not. there are no coincidences.)
the best gift of all.
two years ago, i got the most tragic news. my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer.
it changed my whole world.
for an entire year, i was numb. i didn’t cry. i didn’t feel. i didn’t realize i had completely shut down.
it wasn’t until i met a dear, sweet boy who had experienced love, loss, and lived to tell that i even realized how far removed i was.
he broke my thumb. and broke my heart. wide. open.
he’s no longer in my life, but i think of him every single day. and i’m thankful that even though we didn’t have the ending we once dreamed of, he renewed my hope in love and partnerships. we may not talk. we may not text. but he’ll forever remain in my heart as one of my fondest memories and i wish him all the love and happiness in the world.
merry xxxmas to you. wherever you are.
and thank you. for being my human heater, melting the ice, and breaking down all my walls.
9.9 on the gorgeous scale.
sometimes you meet someone and they seem (almost) perfect.
it leaves you baffled. you’re unable to figure out what’s wrong with them…or why in the world they’d be single?
there HAS to be a reason, you just can’t put your finger on it. you run over it and over it in your head…
this weekend i learned a safe assumption: fallen arches.
at least, that’s what’s assumed about me 😉
sdinsd 